Do we have to sell it?
Can one of us keep the house? Can I list it before everything is final? What is it even worth right now?
Often, no — you don't have to sell. A buyout, a deferred sale, or simply holding for a defined period are all real outcomes, and which one fits usually comes down to whether one person can refinance alone and whether you both accept the same number for the house.
When a divorce petition is filed in California, the summons carries automatic restraining orders — ATROs, under Family Code §2040. They bind the filing spouse immediately and the other spouse once served. Until they're lifted, neither of you can sell, transfer, borrow against, or change title on the house without the other's written consent or a court order.
So "I'll just quietly put it on the market" isn't an available move, even if the house is in one name. Getting a value, though, is completely fine — and it's usually the first thing both attorneys ask for.
The four outcomes, roughly
- Sell and divide. Cleanest, and the only one that doesn't leave you financially tied together.
- One spouse buys the other out. Needs a refinance in one name and an agreed value. The refinance is the part that fails.
- Deferred sale. A court can order the sale put off so children can stay in the home — commonly called a Duke order, under Family Code §3800.
- Co-own for now. Sometimes right, but put an end date and a valuation method in writing.
What I do here
I prepare one valuation both sides can use rather than two that argue with each other, I work with both attorneys, I keep everything in writing, and if it does get listed I run showings and signatures so the two of you never have to be in the same room for it.
Inherited property, and whether probate is required.
Do we have to go through probate? Can we sell before it's done? Is this going to cost us in taxes?
Not every estate goes through full probate, and the answer turns on numbers that most people are never told.
- For deaths on or after April 1, 2025, an estate of $208,850 or less can generally pass by small-estate affidavit — no full probate. That figure holds until April 1, 2028.
- A decedent's primary residence worth $750,000 or less may qualify for a Petition to Determine Succession to Real Property, which is a much shorter road than full administration.
If probate is required, the authority decides everything
- Full authority under the Independent Administration of Estates Act: the representative can sell without a confirmation hearing. A Notice of Proposed Action goes to interested parties at least 15 days before closing; if nobody objects, it closes like an ordinary sale.
- Limited authority: the sale goes to court for confirmation and can be overbid in the courtroom. The first overbid is 10% of the first $10,000 plus 5% of the balance (Probate Code §10311), and the court won't confirm below 90% of the probate referee's appraised value (§10309).
Which one the estate has changes how the house should be priced and marketed from day one. It is worth knowing before anything goes live.
Two tax facts worth more than the house is
- Property tax — Proposition 19. If a child inherits and makes the home their own primary residence within one year, and files the homeowners' exemption, the parent's low assessed value can largely carry forward, up to roughly $1 million of value above it (adjusted for inflation). If nobody moves in, it is reassessed to current market value. For a house held since the 1980s, that difference is often the largest number in the entire decision.
- Capital gains. Inherited property generally receives a stepped-up basis to its date-of-death value — which is why the fear of a huge tax bill on a long-held family home is usually misplaced.
What I do here
I figure out which track you're actually on before anything is listed, price with the referee's appraisal in mind, coordinate with the attorney so the paperwork and the escrow don't collide, and if the house holds forty years of belongings, I have people for that too. There is no hurry on my end.
How much time is actually left.
Is it already too late? Do I lose everything I've put into it? What happens if I do nothing?
California foreclosure is slower than it feels from inside it, and the calendar is fixed. Knowing where you are on it changes what's possible.
- 120+ daysTypically the minimum delinquency before a lender may record a Notice of Default.
- NODThe Notice of Default is recorded. Roughly three months follow before the next step.
- +20 daysA Notice of Trustee's Sale must be recorded at least 20 days before the auction date.
- −5 daysYou can reinstate the loan — catch up what's owed plus fees — until five business days before the sale.
Since January 1, 2025, AB 2424 gives owners of one-to-four-unit residential property a way to buy time specifically in order to sell. Deliver a signed listing agreement with a licensed California broker at least five business days before the scheduled trustee's sale, and the sale must be postponed 45 days. Deliver an executed purchase agreement before the rescheduled date, and it must be postponed another 45.
That is up to 90 additional days, granted for one purpose: so that you sell the house rather than have it sold out from under you.
Why the calendar matters so much
Whatever equity is in your house, a trustee's sale is where it goes first — the auction exists to satisfy the lender, not to protect what you have put in. A sale, even on a short timeline, is how that money stays yours instead.
If I run your numbers and a sale doesn't actually net you anything, I'll tell you that, and point you toward a HUD-approved housing counselor instead. That conversation costs you nothing either way.
You may not need to sell at all.
A buyout, a refinance, a deferred sale, renting it out for a few years, or simply waiting until things settle are all legitimate answers, and sometimes they're the right one. I would rather tell you to keep the house and be the person you call in three years than talk you into a decision you make while you're exhausted.
People I can introduce you to
Family law and probate attorneys, CPAs, HUD-approved housing counselors, estate sale and clean-out crews, movers, and contractors who will do the small repairs and not the large ones. Ask and I'll make the introduction, whether or not there's ever a transaction in it for me.
I live in Benicia and sell houses around Solano County out of the Twin Oaks office on First Street. Thursday evenings I'm usually out on the strait — I teach youth sailing at the yacht club.
I wrote this page because these three situations are where people tend to get the worst advice, and it usually arrives from someone who benefits from the advice.
If you want to talk it through, the number below reaches me. If you don't, the page is yours to keep either way.